“It has been long road to go. I barely remember the times when I was a small
boy who was robbed, who was bullied in school, who felt no reason to live and who
wanted to die.
Now I live in peace with people around me, with my family and with my former
enemies. I can put aside my anger, fear, lust for more and more training to be the
perfect warrior. It was journey, where I grew wiser and older, but not weaker. There
will always be a fighter deep inside me and once someone will pose real threat to me
or people I love, the fighter will emerge and do what is necessary to do. After all the
training I had, I do not doubt my ability to destroy any threat directed at my family. I
would either destroy the threat or die trying. There is no other option. My mind and
my body are programmed to wake up the warrior in the second the threat is present.
But let us keep the fighter sleeping for now.
I found peace knowing my family is safe both physically and financially. Times
where my both hands were trained to destroy are gone. I am looking forward times
where my hands are gently caressing and giving support to my kids, my wife and
people I take care for. And when the necessity emerges, my hands will be tough
again to maintain the justice. There is a reason God gave us exactly the hands we
have as our tools and our free will to guide them. Look at your palms. They are
perfect for holding items, but they are also perfect for shaking hand of your friend.
There is a reason why you can express love and friendship with the same hand as
the hand which you can clench into a fist and hit the bad guys.
Look at your hands again and think of them for a moment. They were made
both do caress small kids, women, animals; create things of beauty, things of utility.
But they were also made for warriors to hold a sword, a shield, a gun or a knife. We
were given free will to use them as we wish. How will YOU use them?
A male or a father has to be both strong and tender at the same time. Strong,
having sword in one hand, using his shield to protect people he loves and tender to
express love to them each day. This task may seem even harder to do, in
comparison to simply fighting the bad guys. But it is not. Protective instincts are in all
men. Love and protect – that is what males were made for.
Looking back I can’t imagine how stupid I was trying to make a suicide when I
was ten. I am sharing my story with intention to give hope to all kids that doubt their
own worth, to give them courage to fight in this ruthless world if parental hands are
not protecting them. Never give up! It will be good in the end, I can promise you that.
I remember times, where I stood in a dark alley against guy who was trying to
slash me with a knife. He is advancing towards my face, I am stepping back once,
twice and then my right foot stumbles upon something. I am falling back seeing blade
centimeters from my face ...That seems so long ago ...
Not many kids were happy enough to grow up in a perfect household where
they felt unconditional love. Don’t blame the parents – they couldn’t give you
something they did not know about, because they did not experience it themselves.
Because you are reading this, consider yourself lucky and be thankful to your
parents, because they gave you life. It is up to you now to live your life as you wish. Be thankful for though childhood, because it gave you also willingness to fight and
change your life for the better.
It took me fifteen years to become fully satisfied with who I am. It took me
fifteen years to get rid of my fears and transform from loser to hero and later to
successful businessman. Now my hero’s journey is over and my transformation from
hero to an adult man and a father begins.
One journey must end so that another one can begin.”