Family is the most important unit in a man's life. We are the same blood and
we have to protect each other. Although I did not love my parents and sister at that
time, when we were together at home, I protected them fiercely from anyone else
outside of the home. When bullies were mocking me, I did nothing and I kept quiet
and hoped they will stop and find someone else to mock.
But when they took someone of my family into theft dirty mouths, anger took control over me and I fought them no matter how many there were. In those moments I did not care about what
would happen to me; the only thing I had in my mind was to bring the bully down and
make him take back what he said. Sometimes I won; sometimes I just got more
beatings. It was mostly like being an animal put to a corner and having no chance to
escape. The only action was to fight back fiercely. Bullies soon found out its not smart
to cross that limit turning weak me into an animal which has nothing to lose. I think
every man has that animal inside him.
There were few friends I spent my time with, but to make my parents happy I
spent a lot of time studying and achieving good grades in school. I learned a lot both
at school and at home. As I said, sensitive and quiet kids are good targets for bullies.
As I was a good learner, I was put in a special class for extended mathematics,
physics and chemistry. I was lucky and we had only one bully in our elite classroom.
The biggest bad guys were in different classrooms. I was not the only one who was
bullied, but I was taught at home that I should not fight so I did not. It was hell. I was
afraid and I knew I was loser.
My life was very predictable as we lived in communism and everything was
planned. The plan was to go to high school, later to college and then become a
manager at any factory. I was eight years old as The Tender Revolution started and
brought democracy to Czechoslovakia. It was Eastern-European democracy to be
more precise. There were political prisoners in jails and our president Havel gave
amnesty to most prisoners including thieves, murders and con men.
They quickly came to power whether it was in the physical underworld, business or politics. I did
not understand what was going on at that time completely, but we saw that if you are
strong and brutal, even police do not know what to do. If you are arrogant and strong
enough, you become a big boss and rule others. Kids in the playground copied it and
the one who was feared by others was the boss of the playground.
I was still nobody and I was afraid to fight back when somebody was bossing me. In school I fought
only once or twice. Our classroom bully was teasing me during the lesson sitting
behind me and I grew angry as he started to say bad things about my mother. I knew
he was an ass hole, but nobody can say such things about my family without taking
punishment. My vision went red and I stood up during the lesson, walked over to him,
kicked him from the stool to the floor and started to choke him.
He tried to beat me, but anger gave me power and invincibility. The teacher was of course immediately there and asked me to stop. I refused. As he went green and teacher was yelling at
me, I stopped and went back to my table.
I was bullied less by the guy from that time on. He probably understood that
when he pushes me over my limit (like with the family) I will do what is necessary to
put him down no matter the consequences. Self respect and my honor are more
important than my life. Since leaving elementary school I have seen the bully only
three times. As I was still young, my parents decided that I would go to the Business
academy high school, just like my sister did.
High school was cool. I had some spare time after school and I watched Star
Trek on the German TV channel with one eye and used the second one to do my
homework. When my parents were in the room, I used both for homework of course.
Once they left I focused back on Star Trek. I did not understand everything that
Captain Jean Luc was saying so I asked my parents if I could take German lessons
after school. They agreed and gave me money for the class. I studied there hard for a
year. My parents were happy that I learned German and I was happy that I
understood my German Star Trek series.
Once on the playground we were playing basketball and the bullies of the
playground started to tease one friend of mine, and I did not know what to do. As I
was very sensitive I was torn apart inside that I could not find the courage to help her
by fighting the guys. I know I was simply afraid and because I was taught my whole
life that I should not fight, I did not. I felt like nobody, like a complete zero. That was
so sad and I got so frustrated that I decided I would change myself to become
courageous and to protect the weak.